Asterix one half
by Brian Boru
Summary: After a mishap with a magical device Ranma is sent to Ancient Gaul and meets a certain pair of Gauls.


**Asterix ½**

**CH. 1**

I OWN NOTHING

"Hey, Akane have you seen Ranma lately?" Kasumei asked.

"No I haven't seen that jerk!" Akane had immediately snapped. They had had another fight over a lunch that Akane had made and Ranma had bolted after school making Akane walk home by herself.

At that moment there came a knock at the front door; Soun came back in shoving a big crate across the ground. He opened the crate and inside was a letter.

_ Dear Tendo and Saotome Families,_

_ If you are looking for the boy Ranma he is unfortunately not here anymore. No he hasn't run away but let me explain. I am a collector of interesting items and as I was lifting some crates young Ranma came by and asked me if he could assist me. I thanked him and he was going through crates like a mad man. However when he saw a crate with an Egyptian cat statue in it he panicked and crashed into another crate. Something broke and young Ranma was sucked into a vortex. However I was able to find out where he went and inside the crate I have sent you, is a gateway to where he went. However it will not be until the summer equinox that the gate will open. That is unfortunately five months from now. I myself will be in hiding until after the boy comes back. I've seen what his lady friends can do and I want no part of that._

_ Yours Truly,_

_ Brian O'Connor _

3

2

1

"WHAT!!"

In the land of Amorican Gaul, in the year 46 B.C. all was fairly peaceful. "Romans!!"

"Ah no, Gauls!" WHAM! POW! BOOM! "AAAAGH!" Well I did say_ fairly_ peaceful.

Obelix brushed his hands and gathered the helmets from the Roman patrol men. His pal Asterix was taking a swig from a small flask of water as the day had been fairly hot. "Hey Obelix? Does it seem like things are getting a little boring around here?"

"What makes you say that? There's wild boar to eat and there are Romans to beat up." Obelix answered then turned and booted a Roman who had tried to play possum, clean over the tree line.

"Aw I don't know Obelix. It just seems like there hasn't been much excitement lately. It's been a while since anything epic has happened." (Actually there had but no one remembers. See _Asterix and the Falling Sky_)

Just as he was saying that he heard someone screaming, "AAAAAAAAAAAAGGGHH!!" He looked for the sound and then looked up to see a young man maybe ten years younger than him (I'm taking a little liberty and say they are 25 not 35) hurtling straight for them from out of the sky. "It's raining men?" Obelix asked. They watched as the boy plowed into the ground, making a small crater. They looked on in surprise as the boy groggily pulled himself out of the ground.

"Uuugh! My head… where am I?" He turned his head and noticed Asterix and Obelix standing nearby. "Who are you?"

Obelix grinned at the kid and said, "I'm Obelix and this is my good friend Asterix. As to where you are why you're in Gaul. Who are you falling out of the sky like that?"

"Well th' name's Ranma and I'm not sure how I got here. The last thing I remember is seeing a c-c-c furry monster from hell, and the next thing I know I'm plowing into the ground."

Asterix went up to Ranma and looked him over and said "That's pretty impressive how you hit the ground that hard and can still walk. How do you do that?"

Ranma grinned and said, "Well that's no surprise I'm a martial artist, I've trained my whole life to be the strongest fighter in the world and I'd be lyin if I said I wasn't."

That encroached on Obelix's pride and he said in a proud voice, "I don't know what a martial artist is, but I can tell you that the warriors of our village are the greatest fighters and I'm the best of them!"

Ranma couldn't let that affront to his pride slide and he said back in a smarmy voice, "Oh really? I don't see how a big fatso like you could be all that great of a fighter."

Asterix and Dogmatix immediately started to back away from the big man, storm clouds appeared on his face and he threw a haymaker bellowing, "I'm not fat!"

The analytical part of Ranma's brain scoffed at the utter lack of form or control that Obelix had, _but a meteorite doesn't have any form either _the common sense part of his mind replied right before the fist connected with his body and he was ploughed through 3 big oak trees before planting into another one. The young man pulled himself out of the imprint he made in the tree then charged back at the big man and shouted, "Oh yea? Well take this! _Kachu Tenshin Amiguriken!"_ With that Ranma planted 1000 punches in the matter of a few seconds. Obelix was blasted back 10 feet and knocked on his back. He got up with little difficulty and tore back into the fray.

The following fight was one worthy of the old ballads, trees were ripped from the ground, and the earth shook. Animals fled from the surrounding countryside and the Romans cowered in their camps. When the dust settled in the center of a huge crater was a barely Obelix standing over a much worse for wear Ranma who had a mild concussion in a classic anime style. Obelix brushed himself off and walked out of the crater, grumbling, "Not fat!"

Asterix walked over to the comatose man, popped open his water jug and poured the contents of it over the young man's face to revive him. It woke the young man up as expected but it was the other results that threw the two Gauls for a loop.

"Damn was that for? Tryin' t'drown me?" Neither Asterix nor Obelix answered because in front of them was no longer the young man that Obelix had fought but a buxom redhead girl that could have given Geriatrix's wife Rhianon, a run for her money.

Asterix recovered first and stuttered out in shock, "What just happened?"

Ranma put hi-her hand behind her head in embarrassment and said well I guess it would have happened anyway so I might as well explain.

So Ranma told her story about the magic pools, when she was done the two older men just stared in dumb shock and horror. Asterix spoke first and said, "Kid all I can say is that I don't envy you!" Obelix silently nodded.

At that point there was a snorting in the brush and out of the brush came a "BOAR!!" Obelix immediately dispatched the boar and slung it over his shoulders and then bolted off into the woods. Ranma sweat dropped at that moment and looked over toward Asterix who shrugged and said, "What can I say, Obelix likes boar. You said hot water reverses it? Let's head over to the village and boil some up for you."

Ranma agreed to this idea and followed the blonde man while Obelix (or the great devourer as the boars call him) continued hunting for something good to roast.

A/N: There will never be a female Ranma/male character pairing! That makes me so sick to my stomach words can't even describe it! Eventually the NWC will come to visit what will either side think of each other : p


End file.
